There are many things to both love and hate about social media. I love
that I can stay in touch with old friends, keep up with colleagues who are
scattered far and wide, read and share informative articles about topics I’m
interested in, and even see my childhood friends’ kids growing up. That stuff
is pretty cool. On the downside, because of social media, I know way more than
I ever cared to know about some of my friends’ political leanings. I’m
subjected to photos of food, and I’m bombarded by acronyms. So many acronyms.
The LOLs, and the IMHOs. The ICYMIs and the FOMOs. Honestly, I can’t keep up.
And don’t even get me started on paragraph long lists of hashtags.
My most recent social media pet peeve is an over-the-top “You go girl!”
thing I’m seeing more and more often. Woman #1, we’ll call her Sue, posts an utterly
mundane status on Facebook. Like she built a spreadsheet at work, or planted a
rose bush in her backyard, or made a cute Halloween decoration. OK, great. Good
for her. It’s not so much the initial status that bugs me. Social media is full
of stuff I don’t necessarily get excited about, like the previously mentioned
photos of food. I have searched the depths of my social media soul, and cannot,
for the life of me, figure out why people insist on sharing photos of food. It
always looks gross and I generally feel like most people don’t care what other
people are eating. But hey, that’s me. There are obviously a lot of foodies out
there who love sharing the food photos. So be it. Likewise, if Sue wants to
show-off her latest work accomplishment or her pretty new rosebush or that
totally adorable, friendly-ghost door decoration, that’s fine. It’s not as if every
single thing everyone posts has to be exciting. We all go through our days
eating and working. We hit the gym, we get pissed off in the long line at
Starbucks, and we enjoy our hobbies, whatever they may be. Of course we’re
going to talk about our day-to-day stuff. The responses are where the craziness
comes in.
Sue’s initial status is followed by comments from at least a half dozen
of Sue’s girl-friends and occasionally some guy (who I can only guess is trying
desperately to get laid), and it goes something like this:
Sally: You rock, Sue!!!! (thumbs up emoji)
Michelle: OMG, you are amazing. You inspire me!
Crystal: Go get ‘em! Go, Sue, Go!!!!!!!!
Amanda: I am SO ridiculously proud of you!
Jennifer: You are AWESOME!!!
Bill: Where’s the triple-like button? This is so cool!
Fiona: XOXOXO!!!!! (twelve heart emojis in rainbow colors)
Gretchen: Love it! Love YOU!!!
The whole thing is dripping in saccharin and always includes more
exclamation points than anyone should use in a LIFETIME, much less a single
Facebook comment. And then Sue dutifully “likes” and replies to each comment.
There’s always the sappy “I love you!!!” person…
I LOVE YOU, SUE!!!!!!!
I love you too, lady!!!
“I Love you MORE, sister!”
Ugh. It’s embarrassing. It’s not like I’m anti-love. I have girl-friends
that I love. I mean, I really love them. Not in a toss-it-around-on-Facebook-and-Instagram
way. I deeply admire their accomplishments (the real ones, not that they made a
nice grilled cheese sandwich for dinner) and who they are as people; they mean
the world to me. Do I tell them that enough? Probably not, but I think they
know it. And when I do say it, it sure as hell isn’t on Facebook, embedded in a
rainbow of heart emojis and followed by a string of exclamation points longer
than my arm.
What IS this? Why are people doing this? (Besides Bill, who I think we
can all agree is just trying to get a date.) But honestly, does Sue REALLY
“rock” because she built a spreadsheet. Does the ghost she made out of a sock truly
inspire you? Are you seriously “ridiculously proud” because she planted a
shrub? I’m all for women supporting women, and I have truly wonderful women in
my life. Here’s the thing though: They’re all smart enough and amazing enough
that they don’t need people blowing random sunshine up their asses over stuff
that doesn’t warrant it.
So can we please stop with the disingenuous, out-of-proportion praise?
It waters down the real stuff. It’s the adult equivalent of the participation
trophy.
